‘I feel like I have had to prove myself in everything that I have ever done in my life’
When Khushi Rastogi moved to Manchester from Bahrain just six months ago, she saw it as an opportunity to lead a life without fear or prejudice for the first time.
Khushi, 18, said she always grew up feeling insecure about herself. From a young age, she says members of her family would try and convince her to ‘bleach’ her skin in order to lose her ‘dark and ugly’ skin tone.
When she was offered a chance to study abroad in Manchester, Khushi, whose family are Indian, said she jumped at the chance to put the negativity behind her and start anew – and she also saw it as an opportunity to inspire others.
“I thought it would be a good decision to come here,” Khushi told the Manchester Evening News. “I have been living in places where my identity is not celebrated and I am not even considered legal.
“It feels like I can just be myself here with more confidence without having to hide anything. I feel a lot more safe here.”
Growing up, Khushi said she would often be recommended products which were designed to lighten her appearance. She said it made her feel ‘alienated’ and ‘sad’.
“People around me, and even some of my family members, have commented on my skin tone in the past and told me I am not beautiful enough,” she explained.
“I have been told that I should bleach my skin or buy certain products, which really lowered my confidence. It is a really extreme thing to say – especially when we are all from the same country and there is already so much colourism within our culture as it is.
“The entire society also seems to idolise white skin so much that it just felt like I was being pressurised so much into it.”
But Khushi recalls one moment where things changed for her. She was told by a shop worker that she had ‘beautiful skin’. It was a simple gesture, but one that motivated her. “It was the first time where I had really heard a comment like that about myself,” she recalls. “It’s like it sparked something in me.”
From then, Khushi began to see herself with a new perspective. Last year, she gathered the courage to take part in the May Queen regional pageant in Bahrain, and was named the recipient of the Audience Choice award. The award led to modelling opportunities, and photoshoots where she got to work with top make-up experts and beauty brands.
Last year, Khushi made the decision to study internationally and landed a spot in Manchester. She is now on a three-year economics course at the University of Manchester. But her choice of career path has also faced its own set of difficulties.
“Even choosing to do economics has been a struggle,” she explains. “In my family and in our culture, engineering and medicine are often seen as good careers and my parents were not very happy when I said what I wanted to do. But when I scored the highest in economics at school, that’s when they were happy for me to do it.”
Khushi said she has also faced fears of being ‘disowned’ over her sexuality. In Bahrain, same-sex sexual activity was decriminalized in 1976 but many LGBTQ+ people still face laws targeting ‘indecency’ and ‘offending morality’ which can often be used against them. Sexual orientation and gender identity are not regarded as protected grounds within the country’s discrimination laws.
“It is a privilege to live in Manchester as the atmosphere here is so welcoming and accepting to the people belonging to the LGBTQ+ community,” she explained. “I am really looking forward to experiencing Manchester Pride for the first time this year.”
One way of supporting members of the LGBTQ+ community who may feel isolated from their home country, Khushi recently started an Instagram page called Unheard Voices of the Queer, which shares stories and messages from people around the world. She also hopes to raise money for Manchester Pride with the project. “I hope it helps other people feel empowered and not alone,” she said of the page.
Whilst studying here, Khushi decided to continue with pageants. She has made it to the finals of the renowned Miss Manchester pageant competition and will now also be representing the city at the Miss Teen Global UK competition on Sunday (March 23). If she makes it through, she will go on to compete at the Miss Teen Global finals in Malaysia in May.
“I feel like I have had to prove myself in everything that I have ever done in my life,” she explains. “My entire life has been trying to prove people wrong – whether it’s to do with my skin colour, my sexuality and my career. I want to prove that I can do what I want and can be who I really am.
“But I also want to show other women and people in my situation that it is something they can also do themselves.
Khushi has made it to the finals of the renown Miss Manchester pageant competition and will now also be representing the city at the Miss Teen Global UK competition on Sunday (March 23). If she makes it through, she will go on to compete at the Miss Teen Global finals in Malaysia in May.
Asked what it would mean to represent the UK at the prestigious event, she responded: “It would mean a lot to me. It would give me an even bigger platform to do what I want to do on a bigger scale and show everybody that it is possible to be who you are.”
